Thursday, March 17, 2005
DEFIANT MCGWIRE TELLS CONGRESS "I WON'T NAME NAMES" OF STEROID USING SLUGGERS, "BUT HERE ARE SOME NICKNAMES"
Retired slugger Mark McGwire told a congressional panel investigating drugs in baseball that he would not "participate in naming names" in some kind of "reckless shameful witchhunt" of "hardworking heroic players" who used steroids "using their own hard earned money", but then added that "nicknames are okay, I guess". He then launched into an hour long list of slugger nicknames who used, abused or thought about abusing steroids. Some of the nicknames he cited included "Slammy Soso", "Marc MacWider" and "Berry Bonz" (aka "The Bonz") -- given the name because, according to McGwire, "he likes berry flavored steroids the best". The panel almost cited McGwire for contempt, blasting the future halloffamer for providing nicknames "that could take weeks to decipher". Mark then added the nickname "Butt Seeleague" to his list, which some pundits felt may have outed baseball commissioner Bud Selig as a steroid user. In response, Selig yelled, "Poppycock! I stopped abusing the juice years ago, and even that was a youthful indiscretion. Besides, everyone knows my real nickname is Fluppy."
