Saturday, August 12, 2006
70's TV SHOW "IRONSYDE", FEATURING DEAF, DUMB, BLIND, DISABLED DETECTIVE WHO TRIPS CRIMINALS WITH HIS CANE, WILL NOT BE COMING TO TV LAND THIS FALL
**FLASH** (Los Angeles, CA) TV Land announced today that classic 70's police series "Ironsyde" - about a deaf, dumb and blind Chief of Detectives for San Francisco PD who, after being shot 47 times in the foot by a sniper, gains telepathic powers, which he uses to find criminals on the run who he then trips with his trusty cane, Brutus - will not be part of their Fall lineup. The news rocked the lucrative "boring cop drama" industry, as this is only the second program TV Land has ever turned down. TV Land's previous rejection was the BotchCo failure "Cop Poetry", in which all dialogue took the form of limericks.
An exec from rival network NosTValgia told NNN that TV Land may still decide to go after the 60's BBC show "Ironsmythe," on which "Ironsyde" is based. In the English version, Ironsmythe's foot is shot only 35 times, and the cane is named Malcolm.
TV Land did, however, announce it has picked up the rights to another popular 70's show, the kid classic "U. R. Puffin' Stuff." This heartwarming series featured a boy named Billy who befriends a group of drugged out unemployed sketch comedy writers and their pudgy 9-foot tall imaginary friend Spliff, who is very rich and supports the do-nothing lifestyle of the writers, but who eventually sues the writers over credit for a show Spliff feels he helped create but that the writers stole, called "Iffy Spiffy Spliff in a Jiffy."
An exec from rival network NosTValgia told NNN that TV Land may still decide to go after the 60's BBC show "Ironsmythe," on which "Ironsyde" is based. In the English version, Ironsmythe's foot is shot only 35 times, and the cane is named Malcolm.
TV Land did, however, announce it has picked up the rights to another popular 70's show, the kid classic "U. R. Puffin' Stuff." This heartwarming series featured a boy named Billy who befriends a group of drugged out unemployed sketch comedy writers and their pudgy 9-foot tall imaginary friend Spliff, who is very rich and supports the do-nothing lifestyle of the writers, but who eventually sues the writers over credit for a show Spliff feels he helped create but that the writers stole, called "Iffy Spiffy Spliff in a Jiffy."
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
LIEBERMAN, LONG LEADLESS, LOSES; LAMENTS LAMONT
Connecticut Senator Admits His Support of President's Plan to Annex Poland May Have Been His Undoing
Joe Lieberman, who vaulted to national attention as the Democratic Party's candidate for Vice President in 2000, lost that party's Senatorial primary August 8th in Connecticut. A major factor in the loss, said his doctor, was that Joe was suffering from a severe case of a malady clinically known as "Nojoementum".
However, the Senator told tens of loyal Connecticutians that, come fall, he will run as an "Independent Democrat." When asked if he just invented that term in order to justify running twice against his Democratic vanquisher, Ned Lamont, Mr. Lieberman said "absolutely not - I don't just make up terms for the hecque of it, pardon my French." When asked how he defines "Independent Democrat", he said that it's "someone whose beliefs are halfway between a 'Lieberal' and a 'Liebertarian' ".
Finally, Joe told the press that, if he loses as an Independent Lieberal-Liebertarian Democrat, he will join the Green Party and run under the name "Mean Joe Green".
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Joe Lieberman, who vaulted to national attention as the Democratic Party's candidate for Vice President in 2000, lost that party's Senatorial primary August 8th in Connecticut. A major factor in the loss, said his doctor, was that Joe was suffering from a severe case of a malady clinically known as "Nojoementum".
However, the Senator told tens of loyal Connecticutians that, come fall, he will run as an "Independent Democrat." When asked if he just invented that term in order to justify running twice against his Democratic vanquisher, Ned Lamont, Mr. Lieberman said "absolutely not - I don't just make up terms for the hecque of it, pardon my French." When asked how he defines "Independent Democrat", he said that it's "someone whose beliefs are halfway between a 'Lieberal' and a 'Liebertarian' ".
Finally, Joe told the press that, if he loses as an Independent Lieberal-Liebertarian Democrat, he will join the Green Party and run under the name "Mean Joe Green".
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