Tuesday, October 12, 2004
PRES. BUSH TO HAVE LARGE BOX-LIKE MOLE REMOVED
The same scientists who discovered the Face On Mars say there is definitely something "lump-like" on the President's upper-back terrain.
President Bush today confirmed plans to undergo surgery after the third and final debate this week, in order to have a large, box-shaped mole removed from his back. The presence of the box-like bump was widely reported in the media, with some interpreting it to be a device for receiving answers to debate questions from a remote transmitter. Such rumors were quickly squashed by the White House with the announcement of the impending operation, which has already garnered sympathy from many swing state voters. "Flowers have been pouring in from Ohio, which I feel deeply blessed to receive", said the President, "and that great state is also the site of my operation and speedy recovery, which should add a few jobs there at least." After a brief chuckle, he began his daily putting practice, then added: "Speedy recovery being the operative word".
