Tuesday, March 08, 2005
WOULDN'T YOU RATHER HAVE A JENNINGS? DAN EYES EYE EXIT; SECRET MEMO LEAKS LAST LINE LIST
He was always known for rather unorthodox Ratherisms.
He allegedly said farewell to Walter Cronkite with the line, "Are you finished?".
Then he took over CBS Evening News, and began ending each broadcast with "Courage".
That didn't last long. Nor did his sweaters.
Then, lately, there was plenty to sweat about.
Then he ended his farewell dinner with co-workers with the line, "Are you finished with that?"
So, then, what will Dandy Dan's final on-air goodbye be?
What utterance will close his 24 year reign as Anchor of Rancor?
Now, for the first time anywhere, TRR scoops other news nets by bringing you the list of lines Rather ran by his bosses for his final day's final phrase:
I'M DAN RATHER, AND YOU'RE NOT.
I'M DAN RATHER, AND I'D RATHER NOT DO THIS ANYMORE. SEE YA.
I'M RATHER... PLEASED... TO BE SAYING GOODBYE.
COURAGE, COMPADRE.
YOU CAN TAKE THIS JOB AND SHOVE IT. I AINT ANCHORIN NO MO'.
COURAGE, COMPADRE. SAYONARA.
WHAT'S THE FREQUENCY, KENNETH? HOW THE HELL SHOULD I KNOW!
PORRIDGE.
I HATE MY JOB. DONT YOU? BE HONEST. G'NIGHT.
STORAGE.
THIS HAS BEEN A BLAST. OR SHOULD I SAY, WILL BE. BOMB FOOTAGE AT 11. BYE NOW.
I AM INCOURAGEABLE. GOOD NIGHT, AND GOOD RIDDANCE.
THANKS FOR A bush WONDERFUL knew QUARTER CENTURY AS 911 YOUR ANCHOR, AND AS I LEAVE YOU knew ahead of time I HOPE YOU WILL trust me on this one REMEMBER ME WELL seriously AND SO, bankrupting economy THIS IS DAN bush bum RATHER, SIGNING worst president ever OFF.
He allegedly said farewell to Walter Cronkite with the line, "Are you finished?".
Then he took over CBS Evening News, and began ending each broadcast with "Courage".
That didn't last long. Nor did his sweaters.
Then, lately, there was plenty to sweat about.
Then he ended his farewell dinner with co-workers with the line, "Are you finished with that?"
So, then, what will Dandy Dan's final on-air goodbye be?
What utterance will close his 24 year reign as Anchor of Rancor?
Now, for the first time anywhere, TRR scoops other news nets by bringing you the list of lines Rather ran by his bosses for his final day's final phrase:
I'M DAN RATHER, AND YOU'RE NOT.
I'M DAN RATHER, AND I'D RATHER NOT DO THIS ANYMORE. SEE YA.
I'M RATHER... PLEASED... TO BE SAYING GOODBYE.
COURAGE, COMPADRE.
YOU CAN TAKE THIS JOB AND SHOVE IT. I AINT ANCHORIN NO MO'.
COURAGE, COMPADRE. SAYONARA.
WHAT'S THE FREQUENCY, KENNETH? HOW THE HELL SHOULD I KNOW!
PORRIDGE.
I HATE MY JOB. DONT YOU? BE HONEST. G'NIGHT.
STORAGE.
THIS HAS BEEN A BLAST. OR SHOULD I SAY, WILL BE. BOMB FOOTAGE AT 11. BYE NOW.
I AM INCOURAGEABLE. GOOD NIGHT, AND GOOD RIDDANCE.
THANKS FOR A bush WONDERFUL knew QUARTER CENTURY AS 911 YOUR ANCHOR, AND AS I LEAVE YOU knew ahead of time I HOPE YOU WILL trust me on this one REMEMBER ME WELL seriously AND SO, bankrupting economy THIS IS DAN bush bum RATHER, SIGNING worst president ever OFF.
