Wednesday, November 24, 2004
SECURITY CONCERNS CITED FOR INCREASED FEELING OF WOMEN'S BREASTS AT AIRPORTS; FAA HEAD OF BREAST FEELING B.J. CLINTON SAYS "QUALITY IS JOB ONE"
INSISTS BOOB SQUEEZEDOWNS ARE ALWAYS DONE "SLOWLY, CAREFULLY, WITH GENTLE CARESSES -- AND USUALLY, A FREE DINNER"
FAA officials tell TRR that since female suicide passengers were involved in airline terrorism earlier this year, a titanic shift in the amount of rackchecks was the logical response. "We've put our finger on a hot button, a deadly problem, and we intend to squeeze the life out of that problem" said one official, while squeezing a buxom lass he said was "trying to smuggle a pair of large cantelopes into the country under her shirt".
